That voice in our head that guides us and takes our word when we ask ourselves who we are … is called an ego. But do you know what it is in reality? Ego is the product of emotions, thoughts and memories that have been accumulated throughout the course of one’s life. But it also concerns certain beliefs that make us see reality in a certain way, and make us think that this way is the true one. The ego tends to attribute labels, such as nationality. Moreover, it identifies itself with all that one possesses, including the self-image that one gives to others. But what if we lose all this at a certain time? What if we have to give up our nationality because we move to another country or lose our assets?
When everything we identify with disappears, an existential void appears, because we think we have lost our identity. This vital emptiness is created because we forget that we are not that voice in our head. We are not our ego, even if our ego is part of us.
What is the function of that voice in our head
Perhaps you are thinking that if the ego is somehow negative, it is because it is so difficult to avoid directing our lives? The truth is that the ego is nothing more than a mechanism to survive in the society in which we have had to live. Because from birth, unconsciously, we build our ego.
What do parents do when they have a baby? They give him a name, the first identification. Then the child begins to grow and understand that there are possessive words like – mine – that allow him to own things and to identify with them.
Continuing to grow, the environment in which he moves teaches him rules and customs, he will understand what he can and can not do, and he will start behaving in a certain way. He will become impregnated with the beliefs that predominate in his family.
That voice in our head allows us to survive, learn the rules that govern life quickly to be able to adapt. We know that in this way we can be loved and get the attention of others. However, the ego always seeks out, making us believe that to be happy, we need a partner, many friends and the approval of others.
The ego hides our true self
To break this identification with the ego, it is important to reflect on the difference between what that voice and the person we really are able to dictate. Whenever we judge someone or confront each other, we must know how to stop and say wait, this is not me, this is just what my ego tells me I am.
It is that voice in our head that screams – he is better than you – that will make us feel that we are worth little and that will help us to cultivate low self-esteem. It is that voice that will always lead us to feel insecure, even in situations where we know we are good, to have potential.
The ego hides our true self. An ego that we usually do not listen to, but which shouts very loudly. An ego that says – leaves this partner who treats you badly – but whose voice is barely audible from the ego, which proposes thoughts such as – what will happen to you, at your age and without a partner? Better to leave things as they are.
Even if that voice in our head has allowed us to survive since we were born to adapt to the society in which we have lived, there is a line beyond which it ceases to be helpful and becomes an enemy. Let’s get rid of it, let’s put it in doubt. The ego is sometimes a great liar and identifying with it is a serious mistake. It will not be easy to put it aside, to remove authority from his voice. It can even make us doubt that we can be someone without it. Let’s stop our ears. The ego is often just a comedian, the voice of our fears.