Assertiveness is a fundamental element in couple communication. But what role does it play in the couple relationship? Of all the existing communication styles, assertiveness is one of the most effective. However, few people are able to put it into practice, especially in couple relationships. Find out how to train assertive couple communication so as to avoid conflicts.
Several articles on the subject of assertiveness explain that this social skill is a behavior that expresses an individual’s feelings and thoughts honestly without hurting others. This aspect is fundamental in any relationship, so it is important to work on the assertive communication of a couple.
Assertive couple communication can be put into practice every day with small and simple actions. But in order for it to be truly effective and allow the members of the couple to come out stronger from a discussion, it is convenient to include the actions we present to follow in our daily life.
Assertiveness – Express what we think and feel
It may seem obvious, and yet the couple’s thoughts or feelings are rarely expressed in couple relationships. This is counterproductive, since we can end up exploding. These annoying moments that we can experience in our everyday life are also an opportunity to exercise assertive couple communication. Better not to keep quiet and always respectfully tell the partner what bothers us.
Assertiveness – Learn to speak for ourselves
For some reason, we tend not to talk in first person when we discuss with someone. Furthermore, we have the habit of blaming the partner and we could also launch sentences like why my friend sees things as I see them. This is a mistake, as it does not allow us to train assertive couple communication. Learning to speak in the first person helps us take responsibility for our emotions and verbalize them.
Improve assertive couple communication
For example, if our partner tells us that we are very messy, we can ask him how we could improve this aspect or why he has this opinion. In this way, we would start a dialogue that will lead us to a solution that will be good for both parties. Because sometimes, the partner looks like an enemy.
Assertiveness – Think before you speak
Although there are several ways to work on couple communication, all these methods must be put into practice every day. This yes, there are several tips that can be of great help to us when we start a discussion to avoid falling into old behavior patterns.
Thinking about the message, but also about the form, feeling bad or even attacked can lead us to hurt our partner. For this reason, it is better to breathe, remain calm and think before speaking. There is no hurry. Think that the ways you choose can invalidate your message and generate a real conflict.
Being empathetic with the partner: learning to put ourselves in the other person’s shoes: a very important aspect if we really know it well. Don’t hold the complaints in, it’s better to express what bothers us when we try it … and not during a conversation where the reason for discussion is different.
We should all dedicate moments of our day to work on assertive couple communication. Thus we will build an intimate relationship in which trust can grow. We remember that hurting ourselves through words is not constructive, but destructive.
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